Belief, Strength, Brokenness.

As the days pass there is evidently a missing part of life. It is her. Yet I know for sure it isn't reciprocated. After all, she has the myriads of other people to turn to. Other guys, for that matter.

In my mind it is for the best. Yet I can't help but want to pick up my phone and type out the usual "good morning", or the "goodnight, sweet dreams" that has been a staple for me for the past month or so. I can't help but stare at the screen of my desktop and glance the walls of social networking sites and messenger contacts hoping to turn back time. When it didn't hurt so much. When life was so much more full of smiles. When I didn't have to cry.

I need an outlet. The last few days have been a torture at some point, and smooth at other times. I used to be able to pull troubles away, but that was always going to her and sharing the heart and mind. I felt at peace. Yet now all I know is that I was taken for granted all the while, that my attention and affection was all that was wanted, no more. There was no sense of loyalty after the good deeds were done. And the hurt just gets deeper as I pen these words down.

Friends have helped me through the days and nights. I'm so thankful for them. I feel I would have imploded upon myself long ago if not for them by my side. Thank you, all of you. There isn't a day that goes by without me feeling thankful I have the few great friends in life to share my heart with.

There isn't much more to say now. You seem happy, as always you are, and me not being around doesn't even bother you one bit, it seems. I'll pick up, and leave. But I'll be around. If you're happier without me then there isn't anything I would or could do. Because I'll only be there if I have a purpose. And there is only one purpose.

Somehow it isn't easy to let it all go, but since there isn't anything to hold on to anymore, I'll hold on to memory. That's about all I have. The regret of being around lingers. The regret of knowing you shall be a lesson.

You once said, that when a boyfriend and girlfriend break up, and yet they can be friends afterwards, they never really loved each other. Well, the notation aside, I don't think I can be a friend to you. Does that say enough?